Jun 11 2012
Opening Segment: Raw opens with John Laurinaitis making his way out to the ring King and Cole plug the fact that Laurinaitis is going to have his job performance evaluated. John Laurinaitis gets on the mic but is immediately cut off by Mr. McMahon’s music. Laurinaitis goes to shake Vince’s hand but Vince says he’s not going to shake his hand no clue where it’s been. Vince tells Laurinaitis to give him one good reason why he shouldn’t be fired.
Laurinaitis uses the people power as an excuse. Vince asks the crowd what they think. The crowd boos Laurinaitis. Laurinaitis tries to compare himself to McMahon and kisses his ass. Vince McMahon cuts a promo on Laurinaitis about the Brock Lesnar situation which cost the company money. Goes on to cut a promo on the Big Show’s new contract claiming that was a horrible investment as well. Laurinaitis claims this is a new Big Show and he’ll prove in two weeks that it was a good investment when he beats Cena.
Laurinaitis claims that he knows how to book talent has a keen eye for it, cuts a promo for awhile plugging himself. Vince isn’t buying any of this crap. Sheamus comes out and makes his way to the ring. He welcomes Vince back. Sheamus cuts a promo claiming that Laurinaitis is right. Claims Laurinaitis is a friend. Goes on to say he’s the type of friend that will fine you half a million dollars plus the whole abuse of power thing. Vince cuts Sheamus off to plug the fact Fire Johnny is trending. Sheamus continues his promo claiming Laurinaitis is the worst GM in the history of WWE. Sheamus goes on to implore Vince to fire Johnny on behalf of the entire WWE locker room.
Laurinaitis says he’s going to book Sheamus in a match right now. Vince stops him in his tracks saying it better be a very impressive opponent along with the rest of the matches tonight. Because by the end of the night Vince claims if he’s not impressed he’ll utter the words “You’re Fired”. Vince leaves the arena in Johnny’s people power scooter then throws it off the stage ramp area. Vince got a huge pop tonight seems like he’s back as a face.
Singles Match (Non-Title): Sheamus defeated Tensai via pinfall. Sheamus hit the Brogue Kick on Tensai to pick up the pinfall victory.
Backstage Segment: Vince claims that things didn’t go so well for Laurinaitis in that match, that’s strike one. Vince asks Johnny who Sheamus new opponent will be for No Way Out (Alberto Del Rio is injured). Vicky comes out of nowhere and suggests that Ziggler and Swagger would be good opponents. Laurinaitis ask Teddy what he would do. Teddy Long suggests putting Ziggler, Swagger, Great Khali, and Christian in a Fatal Four Way Match with the winner getting the #1 contender shot.
Vince likes that idea, Laurinaitis claims he was just going to suggest that and orders Teddy to get them coffee. Vince asks Laurinaitis for a fist pump but notices Laurinaitis has small hands. Vince is really ripping into Laurinaitis today.
In Ring Segment: We come back from the commercial and see Tensai attacking his worshipper Sakamoto. Tensai basically yells what the hell and idiot at Sakamoto as he beats the crap out of him. Tensai then throws Sakamoto to the outside and continues to pound away at him around the ringside area. Eventually referees come out to break up this violence.
Plug: Cole & King plug the 1000th Edition of Raw.
Video Segment: Plugging the upcoming 1000th Raw, they go back to July 13th 2009 where Seth Green hosted. They interview Seth Green about his experience that night.
Backstage Segment: With R-Truth being interviewed by Matt Striker. R-Truth cuts his usual Little Jimmy promo he also cuts a promo on Big Show claiming that he’s going to lose to the Big Show. The Big Show comes out of nowhere and hits the WMD on R-Truth knocking him out unconscious.
Mix Tag Team Match: Beth Phoenix/Ricardo Rodriguez defeated the team of Layla/Santino Marella. Beth Phoenix hit the Glam Slam on Layla to pick up the victory for his team. After the match Ricardo Rodriguez celebrated in the ring only be embarrassed by Santino who rips off Rodriguez shirt to expose a Justin Bieber shirt.
Backstage Segment: Between Vince McMahon and David Otunga. Claims Laurinaitis is doing a good job suggest he would be a good replacement. Vince claims he hates suck ups and lawyers. Kofi Kingston comes out of nowhere demanding to know where Laurinaitis is. Laurinaitis comes in claiming R-truth isn’t doing so well. Kofi Kingston demands a match against Big Show. Laurinaitis in a bothered mood makes a match between Big Show & Kingston for later tonight inside a Steel Cage, sort of like a preview to this Sunday. Vince says, “Not Bad” in regards to Laurinaitis decision.
Promo: Daniel Bryan makes his way to the ring he cuts a promo on his Triple Threat Match this Sunday at No Way Out. Claims he’s nothing like his competitors because he doesn’t have a 90 pound distraction called AJ Lee. He cuts a promo on Punk claiming he’s a superior wrestler and Punk is trying to get with AJ in an attempt to make him jealous. He then cuts a promo on Kane claiming he thinks its second base when a woman looks at him and doesn’t throw up.
Bryan then cuts a promo on AJ claiming that she’s still in love with him. Bryan goes on to cut a heel promo plugging himself the crowd chants Yes Yes Yes. Bryan claims “Once you go Bryan there’s no use in Trying”. Bryan claims he’s not interested in AJ but the WWE Championship. Claims this Sunday he’ll emerge as the new WWE Champion and starts chanting Yes Yes Yes. He’s interrupted by Cm Punk who has a mic in hand from the stage ramp area.
Punk cuts a promo on Bryan claiming for someone no longer interested in AJ he talks about her a lot. Punk goes on to claim outside the ring she’s way out of his league and inside the ring Bryan is not in Punk’s league. Punk goes on to gloat about his WWE Championship. Punk then goes on to plug the match for this Sunday. Punk claims one of two things will happen this Sunday he either beats Bryan or Kane. Promises to walk out this weekend still as WWE Champion, Bryan interrupts him cutting yet another promo about how Punk has changed and he no longer respects him.
Bryan claims that Punk sold out and he’s the biggest sell out in the company. Punk fires back on Bryan making fun of his T-Shirt. Punk goes on to recount the events of last year when he spoke your mind. Punk goes on to cut a promo about all those bandwagon fans who he doesn’t like. Way to alienate your audience pretty sure WWE creative didn’t like that rip on fans. Anyway the point of the promo is he didn’t sell out but Bryan did. Goes on to claim he’s going to give Bryan a wakeup call this Sunday.
Kane comes out to interrupt the two, cuts a promo on both of them and recounts his path of destruction over the years. Goes on to claim this Sunday he’ll leave No Way Out as WwE Champion. AJ comes out of nowhere and begs all of them to please stop. AJ cuts a promo on Kane claiming that deep down inside he actually has a heart. Punk says “You Got to Love Crazy Chicks”, AJ goes on to claim that you never truly get over your first true love claims she hasn’t gotten over Bryan just yet. AJ tells Punk he’s the coolest guy she’s ever met. Bryan demands to know the point, AJ says this Sunday she knows the best man will win.
Laurinaitis interrupts via Titantron claiming that tonight he’s booking Punk/AJ against Kane/Bryan. AJ looks scared while Bryan is laughing his ass off.
Video Segment: They recap the opening segment with Vince and Laurinaitis plugging the fact Johnny may be fired tonight.
Fatal Four Way Elimination Match: Dolph Ziggler defeated The Great Khali, Jack Swagger, and Christian to earn a title shot against Sheamus for the World Heavyweight Championship this Sunday at No Way Out. After the match Sheamus confronts Ziggler on the Ramp area to sell their match this Sunday at No Way Out.
Backstage Segment: Natalya is seen backstage talking to Vince McMahon asking if they can have another Hart reunion. Vince is able to excuse himself from Natalya only to have the Funkettes approach him begging Vince to get Brodus Clay’s ban on Raw lifted. He says no, they then ask Vince to get “Funky” with them. Vince starts dancing with them backstage as music and a strobe light randomly come out of nowhere.
Zack Ryder appears out of nowhere in shock, Vince tells Ryder “Woo Woo Woo, You know it” overall by far the most random moment of Raw tonight.
Handicap Match: Ryback squashed two random jobbers via pinfall. Really wish they would have Ryback face some decent competition instead of squashing jobbers every week. The fans were chanting Goldberg during the match.
Backstage Segment: With Hornswoggle & Vince McMahon watching his impression of JR from Smackdown. Vince McMahon does his best impression of JR backstage and plugs his catch phrase “Sauce it”. Cena approaches Vince backstage, Cena cuts a promo on Laurinaitis claiming Vince should fire Laurinaitis, Vince mentions the fact Cena lost to The Rock. Cena cuts a promo about how Wrestlemania wins matter now, goes on to recount the losses Vince has had at Mania.
Vince tells Cena not to interrupt in Show’s cage match. Cena makes a promise not to interfere, tells McMahon to handle his business. Otunga comes back to suck up to McMahon, McMahon cuts a promo on Otunga again about not respecting a man that literally kisses another man’s ass. Vince McMahon turns to someone and says no offense it turns out to be Regal who’s randomly sitting there.
Steel Cage Match: The Big Show defeated Kofi Kingston by exiting through the steel cage door. The match itself was very one sided with Kofi Kingston being decimated by The Big Show for 10 minutes straight.
Backstage Segment: John Laurinaitis is seen looking on backstage impressed with Show’s performance in that match.
Singles Match: Sin Cara defeated Curt Hawkins via pinfall.
Plug: Cole & King plug the No Way Out PPV this Sunday and recap the entire card. They also announce that Triple H will address the Lesnar/Lawsuit situation.
Backstage Segment: Vince McMahon approaches Daniel Bryan and wishes him good luck on his match tonight. Vince McMahon wants to apparently get Bryan’s opinion on Laurinaitis. Bryan cuts a promo about being fired and being a self made success story. Vince cuts a promo about Bryan losing his championship in 18 seconds and walks off.
Plug: Apparently a former Main Eventer of Raw will be competing in a match in honor of the upcoming 1000th Raw in a few minutes. King & Michael Cole wonder who the invited guest is.
Video Segment: Regarding favorite Raw Moments, Ziggler recaps the first ever Monday Night Raw and Bobby The Brain Hennan trying to sneak into the building.
Promo: Heath Slater is in the ring waiting for his mystery opponent, he cuts a terrible promo about past superstars and why they’re focusing on them instead of current superstars like him. He claims its Slater time. Vader’s music hits to a huge pop.
Singles Match: Vader defeated Heath Slater via pinfall. Vader got the loudest crowd reaction out of everyone tonight. Including you still got it chants.
Video Segment: With David Otunga speaking at a YMCA for the BA Star campaign. Interesting segment considering Otunga has been portrayed as a bully on TV.
Backstage Segment: AJ is freaking out. Punk tries to calm her down. AJ seems to be more focused on liking Punk then the match. Punk was trying to explain to her this will be for all intents and purposes a handicap match. Tells her not to do anything crazy despite it being against her nature, AJ kisses Punk on the cheek.
Main Event - Tag Match: CM Punk/AJ defeated the team of Kane/Bryan. During the match AJ got accidently tagged in and kissed Kane. Kane tags Bryan in and immediately leaves ringside. Punk then gets tagged in and hits the elbow drop on Bryan to pick up the pinfall victory for his team. After the match Kane looks on from afar confused, as AJ sits in the middle of the ring doing her whole crazy chick gimmick, while Punk and Bryan look on bewildered.
Closing Segment: Vince McMahon aka Mr. McMahon makes his way to the ring with security. He’s about to make his decision on Laurinaitis. Vince panders to the crowd (Connecticut) mentions Stephanie was born here. Claims that it’s only appropriate how one life began here one will end here professionally. Seems like Vince is about to fire Laurinaitis. Vince asks Laurinaitis to come out to the ring. Laurinaitis music hits and he limps to the ring in crutches.
Laurinaitis gets on the mic claims he doesn’t appreciate what he did to his scooter, claims Vince doesn’t need the security he would never lay his hands on him. Vince says the security guards aren’t for him but for Laurinaitis. Laurinaitis begs for his job and tells McMahon not to make a rash decision. McMahon looks like he’s about to fire Laurinaitis. But The Big Show’s music hits interrupting McMahon.
Big Show gets on the mic and tries to defend Laurinaitis goes on to mention his iron clad contract which allows him to say or do whatever he wants. Big Show goes on to say Vince could fire him but would have to pay him millions of dollars to sit at home for doing nothing. Tells Vince not to get mad at Laurinaitis claiming it’s not his fault claims its Vince’s fault. Goes on to claim he did everything that he asked of him including not allowing him to be the Giant he truly is. Tells McMahon not to worry about Laurinaitis but about Cena who he’s going to destroy at No Way Out, Cena’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring.
Cena comes out does his stupid comedian gimmick and cuts a promo on Big Show and all his recent complaints. Goes on to plug their match at No Way Out claims he’s the underdog goes on to ask Show what happens if he doesn’t beat Cena. Cena claims if Show doesn’t beat Cena he has no more excuses to make no one else to blame. Goes on to say if Show loses he’ll be the World’s Largest Disappointment, goes says thank to his iron clad contract he’ll have to listen to what the fans say every week.
Vince finally cuts Cena off claims he’ll be sitting ringside this Sunday next to Laurinaitis and if Show doesn’t impress he’ll say those two words. Cena/Show start brawling Show goes to hit the WMD on Cena but Cena moves out of the way instead Vince McMahon gets knocked out. Cena looks on in shock as Show leaves the arena.